Rude Uncaring Policeman

Over 24 Hours Missing

Recently I had reason to telephone our local police to report my son missing. He'd been out all day and all night and didn't show up at college the next morning. This is out of character; despite everything, he usually has the good sense to inform us if he's staying with a friend for the night.

By the next day I was climbing the wall, and my imagination was going into overdrive - he lives in a big city where knife crime is a problem and he's a young man, so, vulnerable in many ways. Ringing around our local hospitals, husband and I were met with nothing but sympathy and assistance. The response from our local police however couldn't have been more different. In fact it was nothing short of a disaster.

Rude Policeman
The communication we had by front-line police-telephone was devoid of basic politeness, let alone anything close to emotional intelligence. I'm inclined to refer to the individual that took our call as PC Plod, and that is being polite I reckon. His tone was demeaning and patronising and he informed me that as my son had no ill-health, wasn't depressed and seemed to be in an equable mood when he left home, he was not to be categorised as a high-priority missing person and would be placed on 'hold'.

Verbal Tirade
I'm pleased to inform that son did eventually turn up, with some reasonable excuses, but I won't go down that route, just to say that he was safe and sound. When I rang Mr Plod back to inform him, I was greeted with a verbal tirade that went on for precisely 17 minutes. I know because we timed him. We put the mobile on the kitchen table, volume up and listened in mounting disbelief. Plod accused us of wasting police time, although all he'd done was spend five minutes taking a few details over the telephone. He lectured us on how the police investigated a missing person, itemising the lengths they went to. He also gave us some patronising advice: to inform our son that as he was living at home with us he should be living by our rules, seriously he said that.

A Bit Scary
It was a strange and slightly unnerving experience. When he eventually finished, husband and I just sat in a stunned silence. Mr Plod was after all meant to be delivering a service that we pay for through our council tax, and we didn't really know what to make of it. The man sounded deranged, unsafe even. And one more thing - if something awful had happened to our son, and we hadn't reported him missing, how would that have made us appear in the eyes of the law?

Tips
Anyway here's a few tips that we've learnt the hard way, none forthcoming from PC Plod I hasten to say, but may be of help for others to prevent the same from happening:

1 Stay abreast of any changes in your own contact details and get off-spring to memorise them. (We were remiss here due to a recent change in job.)

2 Give permission to have your number passed onto some of the more trusted friends of off-spring, should something happen to off-spring's mobile.

3 Ask for off-spring's friends' contact details and names of their friends. They rely so much on Facebook these days you have to make a point of 'catching' these. (We had no idea! Well he is 18.)

4 Check that land-line hasn't got a fault - ours had - and is functioning, even if it had been working earlier on; (don't you just love Virgin?)

5 Most importantly, keep telling your off-spring that you would really really miss them if they decide not to appear when you usually would expect them too!! (Apparently, there have been times when son has been in and we have failed to notice!)

From: The Stolen Child by WB Yeats
Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand.
For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.